Xenopus: frogs that are stitched together

Last night, I decided that I wanted Chinese. So I called the restaurant near my house as I was leaving work. Since I did not have a menu handy, I could not remember what the name of what I wanted was. But I did know that they were wide flat noodles, and I was confident that they would know what it was that I was talking about. Well, I was wrong. It turns out that the fine folks that run my neighborhood Chinese restaurant really don't speak english very well at all. I was kind of surprised. It is not like where I live has a strong Asian population. We don't even have an Asian market here (at least not that I know of). But obviously, there was a communication breakdown. So, I said "I am not sure what it is called, but I want the dish with the wide, flat noodles. You know, kind of like the lo mien, but with a different type of noodle." Simple enough huh? Well, he said that he knew what I was talking about and I said good, I want that with chicken. This puzzled him, for he said that it was only available with pork inside it. Come to find out, he was talking about a steamed pork dumpling. What part of a dumpling has a wide noodle in it? So, I tried again. This time emphasizing the part were it was like lo mien, with the vegetables and all, but instead of a lo mien noodle, it has a wide, flat noodle. So, he said he knew what I was talking about and said it was angle hair rice noodles. Now, exactly what part of angel hair is wide and flat I know not. But in an effort to end this ordeal, I just said yes, that is what I want. So I got it home, and it was not really all that good. The angel hair noodles did not have any seasoning type stuff on them, and they were really bland. I was really disappointed. So, I learned my lesson. Always keep a menu of your most frequented take out place in your car.
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