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Thursday, September 07, 2006

4:00am. I am awakened suddenly from sleep. Why? I check my arms and legs, no, they are not tingley from lack of blood. How about the cats? They are no where to be found. Do I have to pee? Well, no. Did I have a bad dream? Not that I remember. Then it hits me. The most shrill and annoying sound. A cricket. It sounds like he is sitting on my head. I get up to find this beast and locate him outside around the porch. I open the apartment door and remove the cover from my grill. No cricket noise. Yeah, I scared the hell out if him and he is gone forever. Placing my head on my pillow, all the while congratulating myself, when it happens again. The cricket scream is back. I bolt out of bed, take my broom and start hitting everything outside I can find, making as much noise as possible. This will show him, I thought to myself. I will make so much noise that he will be too scared to come back. Again, placing my head on my pillow, feeling good about the next 2 hours of sleep and what do I hear? That damn cricket. So, I wonder around my apartment, trying to decide what to do. I can't hear him in the back room, but the chair is not comfortable. I go back outside for some evasive maneuvering, but no dice. It is slowly creeping to 5:00am and I have to be up at 6:30. That bastard cricket. Ruining my beauty sleep. Finally I decide this is a lose-lose situation so I do what every good concert goer will do when things get loud and annoying, I put in my ear plugs. Now let me tell you, they do not feel too good to sleep in, but I had no choice. The cricket had me in a corner and I had no way out. I finally managed to drift off to sleep. Just you wait til next time cricket. Just you wait.

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